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living with depression

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Q: Advice for living with depression on a daily basis?
I am really depressed & all the advice I’ve gotten for recovery sucks. I can let the idea of recovery go… Is there any good advice for just living with depression?

A: think that there is always tomorrow?

try going outside, skipping and runnings.

and twirling around! makes you feel so goood

i swear. i do it all the time i’m about to crack

Q: How are people living with depression have their lives impacted by it?
and could the consequences be if depression is left untreated?

A: ruins it,,quickly .extremly, dangerous,,that effect is complicated by the supposed embarresment of dealing with it.,,lost a very good friend friday week ago,, wasnt apparent how bad it was, to us,,fired house took his life,impact// he avoided friends,,quit his 20 year job,,re mortagued,home and 18 wheeler,,started gambling,, serious,money,, lost it..lost 200,thou,tractor (truck) over twenty,thou. same on home,,why reason unknown,,perfectly healthy,,popular,,stable life,, talking of voting today said had red eyes from flu,,2 hours later??? answer..result from not dealing with it,,I will always blame my self,,for not realizing it.. hope this helps,, starting point 6mo. earlier,, his 10 year lady friend ,,same thing,,after being laid off in downsize,

Q: Can a person develop some form of depression living with a clinically depressed person?

A: I remember wondering that myself as I continued living my husband’s severe depression issues day in and day out. I felt it was really affecting me and how I went about my daily life. I researched around and came across something known as “Depression Fallout”.

The term is for those who live with and are very much affected by their loved one’s depression or bipolar disorders. You might check it out and see if it fits what you are looking for.

http://depressionfallout.com/

Our happy ending is that we’ve both gotten therapy/counseling. He is still going through his counseling, but he is much better than he was a year ago. It does help to seek counseling for yourself as well, just to get all your frustrations and feelings of helplessness out. It’s truly sad when our loved ones are in a dark place and we are unable to pull them out of it by ourselves.

Q: What are some good ways in means of living with depression?
Do you just try to ignore it or what?

A: No. You have to deal with it. I tried to ignore it, but it catches up with you. You need to get a referral to a psychologist or psychiatrist and start counseling. From there they can prescribe medication relative to your needs. I did and it has been amazing. I was very skeptical, especially due to the controversy tied with medication, and I therefore put it off for a few years, which I regret. In the meantime, talk to some good friends and/or IM/email; friends can be great resources if they’re open-minded and true to you! I wish you all the best.

Q: Depression, I am looking for a good Web Site that talks about living with Depression.?
I need to find a good web site that deals with living with depression, particularly male depression. I know men do not like to talk about their depression but someone must have seen or heard of a good site that gives me an insight as to what it is like for a man to live with depression and what can be done to push through the darkness. What self energising and rewarding things can be done to put value back into life after a man has developed depression, not just being depressed but actually encountering the true illness of depression and the effects of anxiety and panic and impotence. How do we fight back to regain a valuable life?

A: Gigi is right to recommend Dr Burns’ The Feeling Good Handbook. This book basically teaches Cognitive Behavioural Therapy – a technique that is highly effective in cases of anxiety and depression.

In the past couple of years, however, a new option has emerged: computerized cognitive behavioural therapy. It is (slowly) being rolled out acorss the NHS in the UK. NHS Scotland has funded a completely open programme available free online to all.
http://www.livinglifetothefull.com/elearning/
It is still in its early stages, but has had great results so far. A ‘prettier’ version of this type of programme can be bought at www.thewellnessshop.co.uk.

I would really recommend you try CBT. It seems so simple and unlikely to work, but it really does if you stick with it. The best of luck to you. :)

Q: How you deal with the misery of living on Depression?
my misery is getting bigger and bigger..so i might take some ideas from you guys…

A: Please don’t wait any longer. Get professional help. You can feel better. I have had depression for many years but I’m doing better. Therapy and taking medication have helped. Please reach out for help.

Q: Is living with depression a lifestyle choice?
or is it an excuse for laziness?

A: Of course not.. ask anyone with the illness depression ask them hey do you like being depressed? and I think you will get no one to say yes.. I have depression its difficult dealing with it on a day to day basics..uncontrollable thoughts.. can’t concertate.. having people don’t understand if can’t relate.. having conseling.. having to try 6 medications all failed.. trying to find a way out of depression isn’t easy when you have the illness.. yes you can be depressed for couple weeks because something bad happened or whatever.. and get over it.. then having the illness depression every day for 2 1/2 years going on 3 soon.. and haven’t found a answer.. oh yeah dealing with something you don’t understand.. I don’t know why I have depression

Q: Why do some people living with depression feel numb and in pain at the same time?

A: they don’t really feel pain, it’s a feeling of hopelessness and the numbness comes from giving up all hope. The pain part is when you are feeling anxiety which usually precedes the depression.
It’s like running a painful race then being completely depressed and exhausted after losing the race then having no desire to race again.

Q: Whats better, living with depression or being an illegal citizen?
where you know you won’t be depressed
No i know id be depression free in this other place

A: It’s comparing apples to oranges……. One is a choice the other a condition.

Unless you are thinking that moving to another country (where you would be an illegal alien) would make your depression go away. That is very unlikely. There may be stress where you are but there will also be stress as an illegal…….

Q: when living with depression is there always a reason for having it?

A: Probably, but I don’t think you have to find out the specific reason necessarily before you can get better. There are chemical reasons and spiritual reasons and relational reasons and physical reasons and situational reasons and crap adding up reasons.

Q: How do you handle severe depression and living with someone who is critical of you and causes you even more…
pain? I see a psychiatrist and counselor, but this person is causing me so much grief.
It’s my mother-in-law.

A: Your problem is actually with your husband. If he allows this behavior from his mother, he is not your friend. In your vulnerable state, you must have a true friend, that will defend your interests and protect you through your low period. Let me define a friend for you:

If you call an aquaintance, and sob, “I’ve just shot my husband” they will call the cops and try to find you an attorney. A true friend will show up at your door with a body-bag and a shovel.

Get it? They may understand that you are a flawed human, but still love you and see your point of view. None of us can make it without such a person in our life. And you certainly don’t have anyone around you now that qualifies.

I do wish you well.

Q: Any advice on living with depression?
It’s hard for me as I’m still living with my parents until I go to uni next year. It does affect my life and no matter how hard I try to explain they never appreciate it is mental illness and assume it’s just adolesecent emotions, often coldly dismissing me when I’m really low or suicidal.

What to do?

A: change your life style. maybe you worry too much and try to look at things from a diff point of view. depression is not permanent it is something you can get over with time and you have to try your hardest to do that. dont ever give up. you will only fail your self.

Q: living with depression without taking medication?
my boyfriend is currently on three medications, prozac, wellbutrin, and seroquel, the only problem is that he doesnt feel any better being on those medications, he says they make him pretty lazy, unmotivated and have caused him to gain a lot of weight, my questions is is there a way he could live with his depression without these medications and how he would go about it
thank you very much

A: You may like to try cognitive behavioural therapy , a type of counseling service, for your boyfriend. Bring him to a trained therapist and perhaps he can correct his negative thinking with the therapist.

Or he can buy natural medicines such as Valerian root, St John’s Wort, magnesium, zinc, Vitamin B and C, Omega 3 pills, passionflower in a pharmacy. 5-HTP, ribose and GABA may help. Ribose is to provide energy for chronic fatigue.

Pls encourage him to exercise. It is good to do some light exercise in the morning or evening. It can release serotonin, a brain chemical, into his brain and makes him feel better.
Ask him to confide in you or his friends/relatives. Bring him out for a meal, go to a beach or nature park for a walk, swim, listen to soothing music, and read motivational phrases and books over the internet.

He can buy anti-depression books over the internet or bookstore. Most importantly, he needs your encouragement and the support of his family members.

Life can be great. If he hangs on for this period, he can see the light at the end of the tunnel. He can get better.

Maybe you can bring him to a United Pentecostal Church. (www.upci.org) There are healing services there and he can get to know some nice friends there.

Prayer helps. Religion helps. Confide in Jesus, who cares for you and him. Jesus loves you and him.

God bless you.

Q: Resources for depression & living with someone who doesn’t understand?
After 2 yrs of job stress that led to depression I quit a job & I now work PT. I was starting to improve (got on a med & felt more confident to look for another FT job) when my boyfriend of 7 years told me that my depression was affecting him, but he wasn’t pleasant about it. I thought I was doing well!! He’s got his own issues right now and I think he blames me for how he feels…so not only do I now feel unmotivated, hopeless about finding a FT “real” job (he thinks I don’t have to work hard enough where I am now), physically unwell and insecure, BUT I also feel like he pretty much can’t stand me, except of course when it’s time to do certain things. He has to pay all the bills right now so that also upsets him, but I do as much as I can to help & I do all the cleaning, cooking…It’s not enough & he’s scared that I’m not independent enough. I can understand that, but I feel like he’s disgusted with me & I’m sick of feeling hopeless. What can I do? I have a history of depression

A: Oh boy if I can relate to you and your situation!
Please stop blaming yourself, and stop putting yourself down.
I know you hear otherwise; but here is the thing: there is nothing wrong with you.
Don’t hate depression or yourself for feeling depressed. Don’t run away from
your pains but try to embrace it. Your pain is your best friend, is calling
your attention, don’t just look for easy and fast way to get rid of it; work with it.
Go deep inside and listen to it. When you do that what do you see? Do you
see perhaps some feelings that have been there with you your whole life?
Do you remember perhaps the first time you felt this way? Do you remember the
circumstances, maybe reoccurring, that made you feel this way? And then ask
yourself a simple question; what are the conclusions that you came up with,
most likely as a little child? That you are not good enough, that you are not
lovable, not capable of taking care of yourself? Then remind yourself; that
all those beliefs were there to protect you when you were little, and that they
were never true in the first place. Now, you are living your adult life based on
some very old, expired believes. Can you see how this can create some conflict?
Everything in your life is simply the reflection of what is going on inside of you.
If you keep trying to manipulate and try to change the outside world; you will
always come back to the same problems, over and over again. As a result you
will end up feeling even more depressed. Ignore the outside world for a while;
look inside instead. Change what’s inside and I promise you that the whole
outside world will change for you by itself; effortlessly! 
And when you’ll do all that, you will find yourself capable of helping
others who are struggling with the same problems. Then you will find the
real joy! 
Congratulate yourself for making it up to here, but don’t stop here; there are lots
of works that needs to be done and working on “inside” is one of the hardest things
that you will ever have to do. The results make it all so worthy though!

Q: Depression! Living & Dating With Herpes, Help!?
I was diagnosed with herpes in ‘2006. I’ve only had 3-4 outbreaks, but still herpes has become an important factor in my life.After being diagnosed with herpes, I fell into a depression. I kept school and work as my main priorities, became anti-social and cut off dating.

It’s the hardest thing when approached, and each time it happens I reject the offering of conversation or number exchange.Only so to avoid the “Hey, I have herpes” line.

Through a friend, I met a guy, who I am falling for. He accepts the fact I have herpes and treats me with respect and kindness. We’ve been dating for 8 months, but lately I’ve been feeling guilty, and concerned for his health. I don’t want him to get infected, so I’ve seemed to avoid sex, stray away from the relationship and now things are on the rocks.

I don’t know if I will get over it, soon enough to enjoy life again, but as for now it sucks.

Any ideas, comments or concerns, herpes positive or not. Will be really appreciated.

Thank you.

A: I’ve had genital herpes since 1997, and I feel your pain. Herpes does suck.

I decided at some point that I would do my best to protect my partner, and then I’d let THEM make the decision about whether or not I was worth the risk. The only way to be 100% sure that I would never pass my herpes on would be to never have sex again – and that just wasn’t an option.

So I took suppressive antivirals – Famvir – not because I needed to prevent outbreaks, but so that I would reduce the chances that I would spread my herpes to my partner. I was also very very attentive to my symptoms and made sure that we never had sex during (or right around) an outbreak. Also, I made sure that my partner had as much information as they wanted (probably more) about herpes – so that they made an informed decision.

So far, I’ve not infected anyone (that I know of). But its always a risk.

Once you’ve done everything that you can, you need to let your partner be the independent adult that they are and make whatever choice they’re going to make. My guess is that you are totally worth a small risk of herpes. I would hope that your future partner(s) think that you’re worth the risk. It’s a pity that you can’t feel the same way.

You might want to discuss this with your partner. It’s obviously bothering you – and he should be in a positoin to reassure you. Or at least know that you aren’t pulling away because of him – but because you are struggling with your herpes.

Good luck.

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